Mr. Bucket

Today, for the final post of the year, we're going to dive into an all time classic. That's right, we're finally discussing the man, the myth, the legend...Mr. Bucket.

Mr. Bucket was one of the most overly prominent omnipresent toy commercials that I can remember growing up. It aired right alongside Sock-Em-Boppers, honestly, just in terms of how regularly these commercials were overplayed between cartoons. But the thing is, there's something about Mr. Bucket that's stuck with me ever since I first laid eyes on it, despite him being - once again - a toy I sadly never owned myself proper. But there's just something about that deliciously happy grin and those big eyes that are so welcoming, so very wholesome, that even without having actually owned one, I can't help but appreciate the mere act of his existence. And no, despite still being an immature 12 year old girl deep inside this 31 year old grown woman exterior, I don't just like him because he puts balls in his mouth.

I mean, it's funny and all, but it's not why.

In a lot of ways, Mr. Bucket is very much like Elefun, in that you have a few players, a toy that engages with them, and you have to be the first one to do something with the toy to be the winner. Simplistic, certainly, but there's nothing wrong with simplicity. There's a reason minimalism has become exceedingly popular in every facet of life, because it's easy and understandable. Effectively, it's simple so that small children can understand it and enjoy it, because that's who this stuff is marketed towards, obviously. But while reading up on Mr. Bucket, I learned something somewhat interesting, and that's that according to OA Therapy Associates - a clinic in the treatment for sensory problems - included Mr. Bucket in 2005's list of toys that apparently helps hand/eye coordination. Now I'm mad that I wasn't given this as a child, because I had, and still have, severe sensory issues due to my autism and especially have trouble with hand/eye coordination at times. That's why playing stuff like Gameboy was so good for me growing up, not because I was a dweeb who much preferred the company of digital characters from Japan to actual flesh and bone children my age, but because it helped me with my hand/eye coordination.

Originally released by Pressman & Milton Bradley, designed by Wayne Kuna in 1991, Mr. Bucket was obviously the subject of much controversy and ridicule thanks to the whole "balls in his mouth" thing. This was also apparently the only toy ever designed by Wayne Kuna, or at least the only one I could find any information on. Honestly, I thought the "controversy" surrounding Mr. Bucket was stupid as a kid and I find it just as stupid now. Certainly it wasn't the wisest marketing decision by any means, but the whole "won't someone think of the children" mindset was still alive in early 90s, and the fact that Mr. Bucket, a toy that actually was capable of helping children with problems like I have, caught flack for someones poorly worded marketing tagline is a perfect example as to why that overly moral high ground surrounding unfounded outrage is ludicrous.

Mr. Bucket has had a weird release schedule. He originally ran in production from 91 until he was discontinued, only to be re-released in 2007, and then was discontinued again and then re-released again in 2017. He refuses to die, and I for one find that admirable. But, along with the re-releases comes the newer design, and in their attempts to make the whole thing more sleek (and potentially cut down production costs), they took any and all personality Mr. Bucket once had. He now looks like he's been lobotomized, honestly. His eyes are empty of any real personality - now just being giant circles inside other circles - and his nose has been stretched to the point of looking more like a button than a nose. His grin, however, is what really suffered. He's just so...flat now. His cheeks don't pop as much, and his overall demeanor has gone from a bucket who liked having balls in his mouth to a bucket who's just putting balls in his mouth because it's all he's ever known and he can't imagine a different life now after all these years of debasing himself. The whole redesign just is so empty and devoid of any personality, and it's a real shame. They shortened and flattened him, and it's so sad. He once looked so approachable, and now he looks like he's secretly sobbing inside, begging for help. Even the cartoony look on the original box has been traded in for totally digital and thusly viscerally soulless emptiness.

But, I've learned that I have to come to terms with less than stellar underwhelming redesigns because it's just a fact of life at this point. I guess if I could say anything positive about the new Mr. Bucket, it'd be that it could be worse, even though that's more a backhanded compliment than anything else, but it's all I've got. And god forbid I be that old lady who screams, "When I was a kid things were better!" because, honestly, a lot of times that just isn't flat out true and I'd rather be friends with the new generations than a gatekeeper like the boomers wound up being. So here's to the new generation, and the new Mr. Bucket, because both are surprisingly resistant to giving up, and I have to commend them for that.

Mr. Bucket may never hit the heights of fame the likes of which Mr. Potato Head might see, but he'll always have a place in my heart, and he's one of the reasons I originally wanted to start this blog initially, so I think that says more than anything else ever could. I love Mr. Bucket, and I hope maybe one day you will too.

...but I'm still floored they thought "balls in his mouth" was a good idea.